[ His hands wander, too, from her breasts to her back, her hips, up along her sides and back to her breasts, wanting to map out her body, memorize it entirely and never, ever forget what she looks like, what she feels like.
When she squirms against him and starts talking again, John can't help but groan. ]
It's more than okay, it's - please - [ He says it again, sounding as desperate as he feels. ] - God, I want you so much.
( Clarice pulls away, shifting until she's got enough room to undo the fly on his jeans, still trembling when she's tugging the zipper down. It's nervous and it's wanting and it's too much and she can't help but make a small, someone wrecked sound in the back of her throat. )
Lift your hips for me.
( He does and she pulls the denim over his hips and then swears colourfully, flinging her legs off the cot so she can stand free them. Then she's tugging on her own, dark hair falling down around her as she struggles with them. )
[ Despite himself, and despite the arousal churning low in his stomach as he watches Clarice, John chuckles, a low, fond sound as he looks at her. ]
Well, your least sexy is still incredibly sexy, so you're fine.
[ He reaches out, fingers sliding to the back of her thigh, brushing the elastic of her panties as he pulls her close, burying his face in her stomach, lips dragging against her hipbone as he closes his eyes. ]
( Her inhale is sharp, goosebumps following the wake of his touch. Her eyes close for a second, heart lurching in her chest. He's so gentle and she's not sure how to deal with that. This isn't just sex for sex's sake, she's not trying to navigate the possibility of being in love. She is and it feels monumental in a way she doesn't have the words for.
Her fingers curl around his jaw, tipping his head up so she can kiss him from where she stands. It's softer than the others, something delicate and fragile in the way she touches him. Her hands are insistent when they push him back again, when she climbs to straddle him. They're only separated by thin fabric now, Clarice can feel the shape of him where they press together. She's sure he can feel the heat between her thighs too. It's instinct to rock her hips slowly against his, even as she's moving to kiss his throat, teasing his skin into a bruise that won't really come. She's falling apart and it feels amazing. )
[ He presses his face into her stomach for a moment, just for a second of complete and utter vulnerability, something he refuses to show to anyone else - even his very best friends. They all count too much on him, they all need him to be John Proudstar, Thunderbird too much for him to break apart at the seams. But here, and now, he can, because the Mutant isn't who Clarice needs, or wants.
She wants John, the guy behind the armor and the responsibilities. And it's realizing that, it's what felt like a switch in his head, made him see that their connection ran much deeper than two mutants fighting side by side for their freedom. She showed him her broken heart and he'd held her through her tears, not some kind of leader, just a guy that ached for a girl.
And that - that is what he attempts to show in the way he kisses her when she bends towards him, when she pulls him back to lie down, when she straddles him and he licks at her lips again, pushes past with a soft, heartfelt moan at the roll of her hips into his.
This is what he wants her to know as his hands slide around her back, spanning large expanses of skin, fingertips pressing in as he arches into her body, wanting to be as close to her as physically possible. ]
( She can't think and not a single part of her cares.
Every kiss breathes a kind of quiet into her usually busy mind. It's far more gentle than anything she'd thought herself capable of, soft, daring pressing of their lips, hands restlessly moving over each other's skin.
Clarice makes a small, eager sound when he arches against her, swaying into him. They're creatures of helpless motion, just the two of them and the insistent tremble in their skin, the rolling of their hips. Powerless to the wealth of emotion inside of her, she keeps grinding slowly against him, breaking their kiss with a gasp. Her eyes are still bright in the dim light, lips swollen, hair a tangle.
She's never felt more beautiful, and it's all because of the way he looks at her. )
I want --.
( What does she want? Everything. She wants him, in any way she's allowed. )
[ They kiss, intent and slow and like they have all the time in the world, which, right now, it feels like they do, and John wants it, wants to spend the rest of his days right here and now, in Clarice's arms, her skin against his, her muscles trembling under his touch, goosebumps rising all over his arms.
It's not how their lives work, but for now, it's a beautiful daydream. And so they kiss, languid and slow and hot enough to warm up the small space they've found themselves in, all tongues and noses bumping and grazing touches, until Clarice pulls back just a fraction, making John shiver when she speaks. ]
What? [ He reaches up, tucking hair behind her pointy ear, fingers grazing the shell of her ear, soft on the downstroke. ]
What do you want? Tell me. [ He sounds like he's begging. ]
( She doesn't know how to say it. Telling him that they should fuck doesn't exactly encompass it, because this is more about their feelings. So instead, Clarice just shifts on the cot until she can wriggle out of her panties, removing his underwear with more care that she's ever touched him. When they're naked, not a strip of fabric between them, Clarice wraps her hand around his cock and strokes upwards, thumbing over the slit. Her gaze is warm, heated, desperately focused on every single reaction that flickers on his face. )
And me.
( Shuffling forward, Clarice presses her free hand on his shoulder. She's already wet, and part of her feels bold and daring when she rubs the tip of his dick between her lips, thumb tracing circles against warm skin. ) And this.
( She wants nothing more than to sink down on him, let him fill her up inside. ) Tell me I can.
[ His breath catches against his tongue when Clarice wraps a hand around his erection, the touch sending lightning bolts straight up his spine. He bucks against her, unable to help himself, his eyes closing at the sensation, rushing through him like fire in his veins.
He shivers when she moves closer again, teasing, a question in her eyes when he opens his own to look into hers, like there was any way he was ever going to say no. He lets out a slow breath, and wraps an arm around her middle, pulling her down onto him as he lifts his hips again, joining them in one smooth thrust. ]
( It's almost too much. They fit together so easily and the rush of heat it sends through her body has her breath stuttering and her eyes falling closed. Clarice knows she can't make too much noise, but his name falls free from her lips anyway, a shakey whisper that is too loud in the quiet. Taking a minute to indulge in the feeling, she smoothes his hair back from his eyes just to touch him, body trembling around him.
When she starts to move, it's slow, careful. A roll of her hips against his, the feeling of him pressed against sensitive nerves. It's been a long time, but she doesn't feel shy. Not when he watches her so intently.
Kissing him, Clarice clutches onto his arms, using her grip to help ease her back up. She still moves gently, but there's a purpose behind it, teeth biting his lip when he pushes back inside of her. )
[ She says his name and it sounds deafening in his ears, just as much as the groan he can't keep in does, his eyes closing when she touches him, settles on his lap, his feet planted on the ground like an anchor as everything else he's made of shakes in the wake of his feelings., the sensation overwhelming.
Clarice doesn't move for a moment, and John's fingers flex on her hips, trying his best not to dig in too hard as he opens his eyes again, looking straight at her, head tilted, taken by what he can see in the depths of her eyes. When she finally starts moving, John gasps into their kiss, the drag and pull so good he shivers, forcing himself to stay still, let Clarice set the rhythm. ]
( It's slow, but there's no less passion for it. In fact, Clarice would like to move a little faster, a little more frantically. She just knows that's not what they need right now. Instead she keeps her movements careful, makes sure they both feel every second of it, eeking out the delicious agony of making love.
Because that's what they're doing. This isn't a quick fuck. This isn't just two people falling together. They've been through hell and it doesn't look like it'll be any better, but goddamn does she want to make sure he enjoys it.
Every movement is lingering, deep, Clarice grinding against him whenever they meet fully. Her breathing is wrecked already, sweat along her collarbone, her green eyes wide and desperate. She never wants to let him go, her body suddenly alive and eager just because they have this. It's been a long time coming. She can't stop touching him, hungry fingers running through his hair before dropping to his shoulders, palms gliding over his chest. )
[ It's definitely no quick fuck. John's never been good with those anyway, but he's unable to even consider it with Clarice, who is someone he might very well be in love with, or falling in love with. He wants to - He wants to take care of her, sweet and tender and careful, make sure she's enjoying herself, make sure she realizes she's loved. That she knows he cares, deeply, too much, probably.
He gasps, every time Clarice bottoms out and rolls her hips against his own, every time she looks into his eyes, looking desperate and electric and making John wrap his arms tighter around her, hips moving up as they move, just barely, just enough to drive him right out of his mind.
He wants this, wants her, so much it's scaring him, because he doesn't know how to tell her, doesn't know how to show her. But maybe now, here, this - maybe it's enough for Clarice to realize just how deep in John is, how ready he is to give her his all, right alongside the Underground.
She gets to have a part of him no one else does, and he wants her to know. ]
( He's beautiful. She's known that since the moment they met, and while it hadn't been love at first sight it had been something. Clarice finds herself captivated by the look on his face. How open it is, how honest. There's been no disguising the hunger they both have for each other, the need that burns through their veins. This is different. The parts they've tried to hide laid bare for the night.
There's no disguising how he looks at her and makes her feel wanted.
Overcome, Clarice wraps an arm around his shoulders, presses her face to his neck, shifting her hips. They're pressed so close together now that she can feel each shaking breath he takes, the hardness of his nipples, the firmness of his stomach. She has never felt safer in such a vulnerable, compromised position. )
[ When she pushes closer, John just holds Clarice, nose pressed to her jaw, eyes closed tight, letting the sensations take him over, make him forget where he is, who he is, what he's doing. There's only this and there's only the two of them, right now. He shivers, fingers dragging along her spine when she moves, helping her along, breathing hard and loud, her hair tickling the back of his hand.
They don't talk. For now, anyway, the feelings are way too overwhelming for John to be able to say anything, but he hopes what he's feeling is obvious anyway, in the way he pushes up against her, in how he presses his lips to her neck in the softest of kisses, how moans keep escaping him even as he tries to keep quiet.
It's slow, and careful, and desperate all at the same time, months of pent-up feelings, fights and distrust and growing to work together and trust each other and accept their feelings for each other finally exploding out, and it's too much and not enough, all at the same time. ]
( Sex isn't usually like this. Not for Clarice. She's always liked it, sure. There's something thrilling about being wanted. But here, like this, she's aware of how different it feels. How much more this is with John.
She'd give anything to him, if he asked. She'd do anything for him. And that's kind of terrifying, but it makes sense too. They've crashed into each other, been left clinging on as the world started falling apart around them. It's bound to have sped up where her heart would have taken her. She didn't think she could ever have this kind of feeling.
Clarice is warm all over, her skin burning when she rocks her hips against him, grinding down so he fills her all the way up. There's tenderness in the way they hold each other, but there's something else too. A fire, burning frantically between them. She lets out a sharp gasp, muscles clenching around him, her hands shaking against his shoulders. She's desperately close, starved for touch enough that she's already done in. )
[ John grunts, choking on his breathing when Clarice clenches her muscles around his cock, too much, too overwhelming, and yet perfect at the same time, the kind of feeling that John has thought he wasn’t allowed to feel anymore, wasn’t allowing himself to feel. Not when everything was falling apart around them and Mutants needed the Underground more than ever, there was no time for this.
But he was done fighting against his feelings, fighting against himself. He wants Clarice and he can juggle these feelings along taking care of the Underground. He knew he could, and he was tired of trying to push his desires away for the good of the rest. He deserved this, too - a shot at happiness.
Pressing his mouth to the crook of Clarice’s neck, he holds her a little tighter for a moment, just long enough for him to shift them, lying Clarice down on the cot and settling above her, holding himself up with his elbows on either side of her head as he thrusts his hips into hers, looking straight into her eyes. ]
( He moves her onto her back and Clarice makes a short, sharp noise that she can barely cut off as he pushes inside of her. It's still not enough to give them away, but she turns her head to pant wetly against the sheets. Her legs wrap around his waist immediately, the heel of her foot pressed against the small the dip above his ass, nails digging into his shoulders. She doesn't want to let him go, now that she has him.
When she speaks, it's barely a whisper, something frantic shaking her voice. )
John, I --. I can't, it's too ...
( His hips shift, pressing just right, and Clarice chokes on her breath, eyes squeezed shut. She isn't going to last. Her mouth finds his then, kissing him desperately, something greedy and full of need unfurling inside of her. )
[ All the noises Clarice are making are deafening to him. While he knows that she's being quiet, that they're both being quiet, fabric rustling as they move, harsh pants in the tiny space they've found themselves in, the sounds she makes are filling up his ears, making them buzz pleasantly.
His muscles are tense as he moves over, inside her, his fingers curled around the metal cot. The bed is too small to be comfortable, but John barely spares it a thought as Clarice wraps her legs around him, whispers against his skin, making him redouble his efforts, so determined, so... she'd probably say, John-like, only there is nothing soldiery about the way he's moving, about the way he's wanting.
He's shaking with it, skin sweating as it slides against Clarice's, pleasure shooting up his spine with every noise, every shift, every thrust, every bitten down moan. He makes a noise into Clarice's kiss, desperate and a little crazed, a whimper, a shiver running through him. ]
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no subject
Date: 2018-01-28 10:34 pm (UTC)When she squirms against him and starts talking again, John can't help but groan. ]
It's more than okay, it's - please - [ He says it again, sounding as desperate as he feels. ] - God, I want you so much.
no subject
Date: 2018-01-28 10:46 pm (UTC)Lift your hips for me.
( He does and she pulls the denim over his hips and then swears colourfully, flinging her legs off the cot so she can stand free them. Then she's tugging on her own, dark hair falling down around her as she struggles with them. )
This is the least sexy I have ever been.
no subject
Date: 2018-01-28 11:18 pm (UTC)Well, your least sexy is still incredibly sexy, so you're fine.
[ He reaches out, fingers sliding to the back of her thigh, brushing the elastic of her panties as he pulls her close, burying his face in her stomach, lips dragging against her hipbone as he closes his eyes. ]
no subject
Date: 2018-01-30 05:35 pm (UTC)Her fingers curl around his jaw, tipping his head up so she can kiss him from where she stands. It's softer than the others, something delicate and fragile in the way she touches him. Her hands are insistent when they push him back again, when she climbs to straddle him. They're only separated by thin fabric now, Clarice can feel the shape of him where they press together. She's sure he can feel the heat between her thighs too. It's instinct to rock her hips slowly against his, even as she's moving to kiss his throat, teasing his skin into a bruise that won't really come. She's falling apart and it feels amazing. )
no subject
Date: 2018-01-31 09:44 am (UTC)She wants John, the guy behind the armor and the responsibilities. And it's realizing that, it's what felt like a switch in his head, made him see that their connection ran much deeper than two mutants fighting side by side for their freedom. She showed him her broken heart and he'd held her through her tears, not some kind of leader, just a guy that ached for a girl.
And that - that is what he attempts to show in the way he kisses her when she bends towards him, when she pulls him back to lie down, when she straddles him and he licks at her lips again, pushes past with a soft, heartfelt moan at the roll of her hips into his.
This is what he wants her to know as his hands slide around her back, spanning large expanses of skin, fingertips pressing in as he arches into her body, wanting to be as close to her as physically possible. ]
no subject
Date: 2018-02-14 02:30 pm (UTC)Every kiss breathes a kind of quiet into her usually busy mind. It's far more gentle than anything she'd thought herself capable of, soft, daring pressing of their lips, hands restlessly moving over each other's skin.
Clarice makes a small, eager sound when he arches against her, swaying into him. They're creatures of helpless motion, just the two of them and the insistent tremble in their skin, the rolling of their hips. Powerless to the wealth of emotion inside of her, she keeps grinding slowly against him, breaking their kiss with a gasp. Her eyes are still bright in the dim light, lips swollen, hair a tangle.
She's never felt more beautiful, and it's all because of the way he looks at her. )
I want --.
( What does she want? Everything. She wants him, in any way she's allowed. )
no subject
Date: 2018-02-14 03:56 pm (UTC)It's not how their lives work, but for now, it's a beautiful daydream. And so they kiss, languid and slow and hot enough to warm up the small space they've found themselves in, all tongues and noses bumping and grazing touches, until Clarice pulls back just a fraction, making John shiver when she speaks. ]
What? [ He reaches up, tucking hair behind her pointy ear, fingers grazing the shell of her ear, soft on the downstroke. ]
What do you want? Tell me. [ He sounds like he's begging. ]
i'm really struggling with POSITIONS lmao. so let's pretend it can just magically happen
Date: 2018-02-19 07:22 pm (UTC)( She doesn't know how to say it. Telling him that they should fuck doesn't exactly encompass it, because this is more about their feelings. So instead, Clarice just shifts on the cot until she can wriggle out of her panties, removing his underwear with more care that she's ever touched him. When they're naked, not a strip of fabric between them, Clarice wraps her hand around his cock and strokes upwards, thumbing over the slit. Her gaze is warm, heated, desperately focused on every single reaction that flickers on his face. )
And me.
( Shuffling forward, Clarice presses her free hand on his shoulder. She's already wet, and part of her feels bold and daring when she rubs the tip of his dick between her lips, thumb tracing circles against warm skin. ) And this.
( She wants nothing more than to sink down on him, let him fill her up inside. ) Tell me I can.
no subject
Date: 2018-02-21 04:07 pm (UTC)He shivers when she moves closer again, teasing, a question in her eyes when he opens his own to look into hers, like there was any way he was ever going to say no. He lets out a slow breath, and wraps an arm around her middle, pulling her down onto him as he lifts his hips again, joining them in one smooth thrust. ]
Please -
no subject
Date: 2018-02-28 04:10 pm (UTC)When she starts to move, it's slow, careful. A roll of her hips against his, the feeling of him pressed against sensitive nerves. It's been a long time, but she doesn't feel shy. Not when he watches her so intently.
Kissing him, Clarice clutches onto his arms, using her grip to help ease her back up. She still moves gently, but there's a purpose behind it, teeth biting his lip when he pushes back inside of her. )
no subject
Date: 2018-03-01 11:27 am (UTC)Clarice doesn't move for a moment, and John's fingers flex on her hips, trying his best not to dig in too hard as he opens his eyes again, looking straight at her, head tilted, taken by what he can see in the depths of her eyes. When she finally starts moving, John gasps into their kiss, the drag and pull so good he shivers, forcing himself to stay still, let Clarice set the rhythm. ]
no subject
Date: 2018-03-01 07:07 pm (UTC)Because that's what they're doing. This isn't a quick fuck. This isn't just two people falling together. They've been through hell and it doesn't look like it'll be any better, but goddamn does she want to make sure he enjoys it.
Every movement is lingering, deep, Clarice grinding against him whenever they meet fully. Her breathing is wrecked already, sweat along her collarbone, her green eyes wide and desperate. She never wants to let him go, her body suddenly alive and eager just because they have this. It's been a long time coming. She can't stop touching him, hungry fingers running through his hair before dropping to his shoulders, palms gliding over his chest. )
no subject
Date: 2018-03-05 03:24 pm (UTC)He gasps, every time Clarice bottoms out and rolls her hips against his own, every time she looks into his eyes, looking desperate and electric and making John wrap his arms tighter around her, hips moving up as they move, just barely, just enough to drive him right out of his mind.
He wants this, wants her, so much it's scaring him, because he doesn't know how to tell her, doesn't know how to show her. But maybe now, here, this - maybe it's enough for Clarice to realize just how deep in John is, how ready he is to give her his all, right alongside the Underground.
She gets to have a part of him no one else does, and he wants her to know. ]
no subject
Date: 2018-03-08 04:16 pm (UTC)There's no disguising how he looks at her and makes her feel wanted.
Overcome, Clarice wraps an arm around his shoulders, presses her face to his neck, shifting her hips. They're pressed so close together now that she can feel each shaking breath he takes, the hardness of his nipples, the firmness of his stomach. She has never felt safer in such a vulnerable, compromised position. )
no subject
Date: 2018-03-12 11:32 am (UTC)They don't talk. For now, anyway, the feelings are way too overwhelming for John to be able to say anything, but he hopes what he's feeling is obvious anyway, in the way he pushes up against her, in how he presses his lips to her neck in the softest of kisses, how moans keep escaping him even as he tries to keep quiet.
It's slow, and careful, and desperate all at the same time, months of pent-up feelings, fights and distrust and growing to work together and trust each other and accept their feelings for each other finally exploding out, and it's too much and not enough, all at the same time. ]
no subject
Date: 2018-03-24 05:55 pm (UTC)She'd give anything to him, if he asked. She'd do anything for him. And that's kind of terrifying, but it makes sense too. They've crashed into each other, been left clinging on as the world started falling apart around them. It's bound to have sped up where her heart would have taken her. She didn't think she could ever have this kind of feeling.
Clarice is warm all over, her skin burning when she rocks her hips against him, grinding down so he fills her all the way up. There's tenderness in the way they hold each other, but there's something else too. A fire, burning frantically between them. She lets out a sharp gasp, muscles clenching around him, her hands shaking against his shoulders. She's desperately close, starved for touch enough that she's already done in. )
no subject
Date: 2018-03-24 08:23 pm (UTC)But he was done fighting against his feelings, fighting against himself. He wants Clarice and he can juggle these feelings along taking care of the Underground. He knew he could, and he was tired of trying to push his desires away for the good of the rest. He deserved this, too - a shot at happiness.
Pressing his mouth to the crook of Clarice’s neck, he holds her a little tighter for a moment, just long enough for him to shift them, lying Clarice down on the cot and settling above her, holding himself up with his elbows on either side of her head as he thrusts his hips into hers, looking straight into her eyes. ]
no subject
Date: 2018-03-28 05:21 pm (UTC)When she speaks, it's barely a whisper, something frantic shaking her voice. )
John, I --. I can't, it's too ...
( His hips shift, pressing just right, and Clarice chokes on her breath, eyes squeezed shut. She isn't going to last. Her mouth finds his then, kissing him desperately, something greedy and full of need unfurling inside of her. )
no subject
Date: 2018-04-01 09:15 am (UTC)His muscles are tense as he moves over, inside her, his fingers curled around the metal cot. The bed is too small to be comfortable, but John barely spares it a thought as Clarice wraps her legs around him, whispers against his skin, making him redouble his efforts, so determined, so... she'd probably say, John-like, only there is nothing soldiery about the way he's moving, about the way he's wanting.
He's shaking with it, skin sweating as it slides against Clarice's, pleasure shooting up his spine with every noise, every shift, every thrust, every bitten down moan. He makes a noise into Clarice's kiss, desperate and a little crazed, a whimper, a shiver running through him. ]